How do we parent Facebook users?
Just as in your child’s offline life, you are key to helping him or her form a
positive identity, maintain good relationships, and create a positive reputation
on the social Web. We’ll get specific in the how-to section, but here are a few
basic social-Web parenting tips that would be very helpful to keep in mind:
Facebook use is very individual, which is why the No. 1 safety tip is “Talk
with your child.” Don't believe everything you read or hear about youth in
Facebook, including in the news media, which often present a very negative
picture. Adults who don’t understand social media sometimes think of using
Facebook as a single activity to which young people can get “addicted.” If
they’re addicted to anything when using Facebook, it would be to their school
friends or social experience. But even two children of different ages in a single
family can use Facebook very differently. A recent study found that 1) even for
avid young Facebook users, its use hasn’t replaced their offline interests, such
as sports or music, and 2) even when young people leave Facebook “on” all
the time, it's often just “running in the background” as they do other things. If
they’re using Facebook while doing homework, parents may want to address
the possibility of too much distraction from academic work.
As a parent, you are part of the solution when negative things happen,
which is why you need to be informed not just about Facebook or social
networking but also (and especially) about your children's use of them. They
need your back-up.
Try not to overreact if something negative happens – another reason
why it helps to be informed. An informed parent is a calm parent, and children
are more likely to go to their parents when the conversation can stay calm and
thoughtful. You can help them more when they choose to come and talk to
you, so you'll want to maximize those opportunities for communication and
support.
The well-stocked toolbox of today’s parenting includes your family’s
values, household policies and rules (about, for example, how children use
their time and when it’s best to have digital devices turned off), and
sometimes technology, or “parental control” tools, such as filtering and
monitoring software products. If your child is uncommunicative about his or
her online time, sometimes it helps to use monitoring software to know what
kids are up to. It’s usually best to be open with them about your use of a
monitoring product, because if you do discover inappropriate Internet use,
they won't be surprised that you know and turn the conversation into an
argument about something other than their safety.
6
Facebook itself can be a great parenting tool. It can give you a rare
window into your children's social lives as well as help you stay informed
about their use of the site. In fact, ask your kids to show you how to set
Facebook’s privacy and safety features. Not only will you learn more about
Facebook, you’ll see how much they know about using the site wisely. If they
haven't thought much about the privacy settings, use this guide to go through
them together. After that, consider creating your own account on Facebook so
you can “friend” your child. That’s probably the best “monitoring tool” you
could use. Many parents do. But do be careful about writing on their “wall”
(Facebook page) or commenting on what they post; that might embarrass
them, which can create an unnecessary unwanted communication barrier
between you and your child.
Just as in your child’s offline life, you are key to helping him or her form a
positive identity, maintain good relationships, and create a positive reputation
on the social Web. We’ll get specific in the how-to section, but here are a few
basic social-Web parenting tips that would be very helpful to keep in mind:
Facebook use is very individual, which is why the No. 1 safety tip is “Talk
with your child.” Don't believe everything you read or hear about youth in
Facebook, including in the news media, which often present a very negative
picture. Adults who don’t understand social media sometimes think of using
Facebook as a single activity to which young people can get “addicted.” If
they’re addicted to anything when using Facebook, it would be to their school
friends or social experience. But even two children of different ages in a single
family can use Facebook very differently. A recent study found that 1) even for
avid young Facebook users, its use hasn’t replaced their offline interests, such
as sports or music, and 2) even when young people leave Facebook “on” all
the time, it's often just “running in the background” as they do other things. If
they’re using Facebook while doing homework, parents may want to address
the possibility of too much distraction from academic work.
As a parent, you are part of the solution when negative things happen,
which is why you need to be informed not just about Facebook or social
networking but also (and especially) about your children's use of them. They
need your back-up.
Try not to overreact if something negative happens – another reason
why it helps to be informed. An informed parent is a calm parent, and children
are more likely to go to their parents when the conversation can stay calm and
thoughtful. You can help them more when they choose to come and talk to
you, so you'll want to maximize those opportunities for communication and
support.
The well-stocked toolbox of today’s parenting includes your family’s
values, household policies and rules (about, for example, how children use
their time and when it’s best to have digital devices turned off), and
sometimes technology, or “parental control” tools, such as filtering and
monitoring software products. If your child is uncommunicative about his or
her online time, sometimes it helps to use monitoring software to know what
kids are up to. It’s usually best to be open with them about your use of a
monitoring product, because if you do discover inappropriate Internet use,
they won't be surprised that you know and turn the conversation into an
argument about something other than their safety.
6
Facebook itself can be a great parenting tool. It can give you a rare
window into your children's social lives as well as help you stay informed
about their use of the site. In fact, ask your kids to show you how to set
Facebook’s privacy and safety features. Not only will you learn more about
Facebook, you’ll see how much they know about using the site wisely. If they
haven't thought much about the privacy settings, use this guide to go through
them together. After that, consider creating your own account on Facebook so
you can “friend” your child. That’s probably the best “monitoring tool” you
could use. Many parents do. But do be careful about writing on their “wall”
(Facebook page) or commenting on what they post; that might embarrass
them, which can create an unnecessary unwanted communication barrier
between you and your child.
No comments:
Post a Comment